TWIST

...there's never enough time.

Monday, November 27, 2000

The Joy of Mad-Libs on the Internet

[this one was for david d'amico]

The story of Dave Da'Flimico

Originally by Owen Prater

I was born in the teepee at the rez almost 19 years ago. My mother was a junior spanking champion and my father was a dead monkey fucker. I had 2 brothers and 1 sisters. Our family was unusually friendy with one another while we showered. We went on many vacations. One memorable year we went to the teepee at the rez. Our luggage got lost and all we had were 2 rather small jars of rotted snatch. We didn't even have a cum covered pubic hair! Besides that, I think my family was pretty normal. Sure, one of my brothers kept an a bloody dildo with poop on it under his pillow and took it with him everywhere. In addition, my Mom, Wendy ate wet asshole everyday with dinner. Well, I guess every family has their own quirks. Ours just has more then most.

posted by This Old Man # 2:04 PM 0 comments

The Bowl of Ramin That Ended Up in My Shoes (Purchase File #37)

Squeakywheel5: you go buy food now okay?
dj applejax: yeah.
dj applejax: i'm gonna die if i don't.
Squeakywheel5: me too

later...

dj applejax: to save me money... i decided to eat ramin noodles... i've been miserable ever since i got here today... i didn't want to come back to this place, and i'm stuck here for 18 more days... i hate everything about this place... i'm down to 2 packages of ramin noodles... the bowl of freshly seperated ramin, sit on my desk and somehow i knock the bowl off the desk, and all over my floor, my seat, and inside my fucking boots... i really am not having a good night. i think i need to watch the three stooges and go to bed...

posted by This Old Man # 2:59 AM 0 comments

Archives

May 07, 1990 July 06, 1995 August 07, 1997 January 26, 1998 September 01, 1998 December 16, 1999 January 29, 2000 February 01, 2000 February 02, 2000 February 10, 2000 February 13, 2000 March 02, 2000 April 17, 2000 April 19, 2000 April 25, 2000 April 30, 2000 May 25, 2000 August 23, 2000 August 30, 2000 September 11, 2000 October 10, 2000 October 11, 2000 October 18, 2000 October 25, 2000 October 26, 2000 October 30, 2000 November 02, 2000 November 06, 2000 November 11, 2000 November 18, 2000 November 20, 2000 November 27, 2000 December 10, 2000 December 25, 2000 February 02, 2001 February 24, 2001 July 25, 2001 July 27, 2001 August 30, 2001 October 02, 2001 October 24, 2001 October 28, 2001 November 01, 2001 December 06, 2001 December 24, 2001 May 08, 2002 October 21, 2002 January 12, 2003 February 07, 2003 April 05, 2003 May 06, 2003 July 21, 2003 August 07, 2003 August 30, 2003 September 09, 2003 September 18, 2003 October 05, 2003 October 28, 2003 November 20, 2003 December 10, 2003 December 16, 2003 December 20, 2003 January 12, 2004 February 07, 2004 February 29, 2004 March 10, 2004 April 20, 2004 April 25, 2004 July 27, 2004 September 27, 2004 September 28, 2004 November 22, 2004 December 09, 2004 June 16, 2020